Marry the Night

 

"Marry the Night is about marrying the darkness, marrying what is difficult about your life so I guess what the video is asking from all of you is to bear your struggles very close to your heart and have them be a part of you that you're proud of as opposed to being something that you are ashamed of." -Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga. If there was ever an enigma on this planet most people would say Lady Gaga would be it. People don't "get" why she dresses the way she does, acts the way she does, bears herself the way that she does. But for me, I totally get it. She is me. Just with a thousand times more guts, confidence and money. The truth is that the person underneath the Lady Gaga persona is not in any way an enigma. She is one of the very few, very fortunate people on this earth who have the courage to be completely forth coming, brutally  honest, real and extremely raw about their lives. She has been through a lot of shit in her life (as have I) and she could have let it literally kill her (like I could have many times over the years) but she chose to embrace her life and all of it's punches in the face and live her life. She is a genuinely beautiful person on the inside and she really cares about people and her musical career is her way of getting the message out to the world that no matter what we go through in life we can overcome it and be a better person because of it. May sound cheesy but for me it's exactly the inspiration I need right now. I love that she is so raw and real about her life. I love that she doesn't care what people think of her. I love her honesty. I love her creativity. And I especially love that she doesn't filter herself just to appease the masses. And I would even venture to say that she especially doesn't filter herself to appease any of the close friends or family that surround her day in and day out (unlike me). 

I have been sitting on this blog for over a week now trying to decide what my first "real" post was going to be about. I didn't know if I wanted a blog that was just kind of fluffy and fun or if I wanted to go the complete opposite and write only about my struggles in life. I kept thinking that people would probably get sick of hearing the struggles but you know what; who the hell cares. This blog is for me. This blog is to help me figure out who I really am as a person. Deep down, underneath all of the masks I wear and between the filtered lines that I speak each day....yeah, I need to get down to THAT person. I need to finally be able to embrace THAT person. Cause I really think that I will really like her when I finally find her. So I've decided that I'm just going to write each day and whatever comes out of me that day will be great....no matter what side of the spectrum it falls on.  

~Much love and hugs~

Ashlee